As a devoted friend of at least one of the schizophrenic pyromaniac, 1 of the 6 in piercing/laceration or whatever it is, and one who is of age and yet unlacerated, I was diappointed not to witness her ritual laceration. My own unlacerated state has been caused by 2 things, fear of conforming to the stereotypical expectations of others and dread of needles etc. Whichever of these is predominant I feel that it is a valid reason.

While on a walk with a fat ginger pony and it's screaming little owner, I realised that the strange incidents at my school were no accident or coincidence. It is, I realise, the UK HQ of the SSSS (Society for the Short, Spectacled and Scary). The name of this organisation only begins to betray it's scarily nazist tendencies. The 2 main weapons of the SSSS are stress and coffee, one leading predictably to the other. By eventually causing every person to become addicted to coffee, the SSSS will achieve their aim of world domination easily, as everyone will be too stressed or lethargic to stop them. Schools are, without exception, youth indoctrination centres, demanding unreasonable amounts of work in miniscule amounts of time to the effect of making coffee addicts of both the students and the teachers. There are only 3 ways to defy this dark and evil regime:
1 - don't stress
2 - be happy
3 - don't drink coffee, particularly not black, under any circumstances.
Will you be indoctrinated?

Hiel Short Spectacled Scary One!

by Anaerobic Mermaid